One More Time
by Aqua-Dawn
Summary: What happens when Yamamoto returns from a mission and hears the news about Gokudera from Tsuna? TYL!8059 TYL!1859 [Currently on hiatus]
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **I obviously don't own KHR, or I wouldn't be writing this fic.

**Warning: **Some Gokudera language and it's an 8059 fic, so if you don't like boyxboy you better not read it.

**Summary: **What happens when Yamamoto returns form a mission and hears the news about Gokudera from Tsuna? TYL!8059.

**Side note: **Anything that isn't in the flashbacks is spoken in Italian.

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_[The pilot will begin the descent momentarily. __Please make sure that your seat and tray tables are in their upright and locked position.]_

Yamamoto leaned towards the window, his forehead touching the cold material as he watched the land barely visible between the clouds below. And then the world outside turned white before revealing the beauty of his destination. Italy. He had been waiting for this moment for years, the day when he would come to the country without a mission. They had bought the tickets long ago, filled with anticipation, but now the seat beside him was empty, the other ticket tucked inside his pocket, unused. Yamamoto closed his sleep deprived eyes and leaned back in his seat, letting out a heavy sigh. He had not been able to sleep since he came back from his mission, not after hearing Tsuna utter those words.

"_Gokudera is no longer here." Tsuna's eyes flickered to the side in a way that reminded him of his boss ten years prior. Yamamoto stared at him, not fully comprehending the meaning behind those words. Why was he not there? Then Tsuna spoke again, his eyes meeting those of his guardian. "Your mission was taking so long and Gokudera… well, he got more and more irritable by the day, so he…" Tsuna's voice faded and a look of pain crossed his face._

"_That herbivore left on a mission by himself." Hibari cut in as it seemed that the Vongola tenth was not about to continue._

"_Then, where is he?" Yamamoto inquired, his heart almost stopping upon seeing the dejected faces of his fellow guardians._

The plane shook as the wheels made contact with the ground, abruptly interrupting his trail of thoughts.

_[We have not reached our destination. The local time is 20.30 and the temperature lies at a comfortable 18°C. We hope you enjoy your stay and thank you for flying with us today.]_

The fasten seatbelt sign was turned off and the passengers flew to their feet, trying to grab their carryon items and get out before anyone else. Yamamoto remained in his seat, knowing that he would not be able to get off any sooner by competing with the other passengers. Bianchi was not expecting him until the following day anyway. Unconsciously his hand wandered to his pocket, pulling out one of the three boxes stowed there. He twirled it between his fingers, watching it absentmindedly. The Italian had given it to him, saying that people would stare if he walked around with a fucking sword attached to his hip.

"Signor?" he turned his head to see one of the airhostesses standing by his row. "Are you alright?" he noted that he was the only passenger who had yet to leave the plane. When he did not respond the woman smiled at him. "That's a pretty box. Is it for someone special?"

"It was a gift." His eyes traced the blue ornaments on it. The woman's smile widened.

"From your lover?"

"Sì." Yamamoto returned her smile, though it did not quite reach his eyes. Putting the box back in his pocket he grabbed the seat in front of him and pulled himself up, having to bend forward in order not to hit his head. As he seemed to be okay the airhostess wished him a pleasant stay and continued towards the back of the cabin. After retrieving his bag from the overhead compartment Yamamoto passed through the passport control and headed to the car rental.

He did not pay much attention to the small room at the motel he had pulled in at. He did not even bother to turn on the lights, but simply placed his bag on the floor and undressed before crawling onto the creaking bed. He lay motionless in the darkness, watching the light that danced across the ceiling as cars passed by through the night. He was exhausted, but his mind would not settle down knowing that the person who was supposed to be lying next to him was absent. During missions there was no problem, every nerve focusing on the task at hand, but now… Yamamoto closed his eyes, trying to imagine the peaceful breathing of his lover. Eventually, sleep wrapped around his mind like a thick mist.

Not a single cloud tainted the sky's blue canvas as he approached the mansion. It seemed as if the radio's promise had come true and Yamamoto noticed that the temperature had reached over thirty. Thankful for the AC he shook off his suit jacket and loosened the tie. Dust swirled behind the car as he pulled to a stop in front of the mansion. Stepping out of the car he took his bag and flung his suit jacket over his arm. As he walked up the marble stairs he was greeted by the fluttering of wings and a few steps later he spotted a flock of doves circling just above the marble terrace. A speck of white caught his eyes. Among the birds stood a person with silver hair and emerald eyes, his expression more serene than Yamamoto had ever seen him.

"Hayato!" he exclaimed, drawing the young man's attention. "Please call my name one more time." A sad smile touched the Italian's lips before they parted.

"I wish I could."

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**[AN]: **That's it for part one =3 I've had this idea for quite some time and I hope you liked reading it. Sorry if Yamamoto seemed OoC, but his TYL! self is more serious than the younger one and I believe that he would turn even more serious if something happened to anyone of his friends.

18°C = 64 Fahrenheit and 30°C = 86 Fahrenheit.

Senor is Italian for Mr. and sì means yes.

Please review if you liked it =3


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: **I still don't own KHR…

**Warning: **An 8059 fic, so if you don't like boyxboy you better not read it.

**Side note: **Anything that isn't in the flashbacks is spoken in Italian.

* * *

"How bad is it?" he asked Bianchi sitting across the table.

"Well…" she followed his gaze to the man wandering through the gardens below. "He knows I'm his sister and seemed to recognize Shamal, so we told him he's our family doctor. He doesn't seem to remember anything Mafia related though." It was just like Tsuna had told him, though nothing had prepared him to having his lover looking at him as if he was a stranger. "He didn't even recognize Tsuna, but he seemed to be intimidated by Hibari." Yamamoto remembered that the cloud guardian had been supposed to join Gokudera on his mission and that he had sounded almost regretful when he had told him to "_bring that herbivore back to normal_". He could not quite shake the feeling that something had happened between the two while he was gone.

"Is there any chance that he'll remember?" Yamamoto's hope faltered as Bianchi turned to face him. Even though she was smiling her eyes betrayed her.

"Shamal said there's always a chance. We hoped that seeing you might trigger something, but…"

"Bianchi?" Both turned to see the silver head standing at the door to the balcony. "I was wondering if you and our guest would like something to drink."

"Why don't you keep him company for a while and I'll go tell one of the maids to bring us some refreshments?" Bianchi gave her brother a fond smile while pointing to the chair she had occupied. "After all, he came to meet you." With that she left them.

Yamamoto studied the man sitting in front of him. Though he was clad in plain clothes and bore a gentler expression he was without a doubt the man he loved. He could sense that his Gokudera was still there, just deeply buried.

"You made me very happy you know, senor..?" the Italian watched him expectantly.

"Yamamoto Takeshi."

"Takeshi." Gokudera looked puzzled for a moment before grinning towards him. "None of the others would call me by something other than my surname." He reached over and plucked a red flower from the plant twined around the stone fence, letting it rest in the palm of his hand. "Though Bianchi told me it's customary it made me feel lonely." Unable to bear seeing such a forlorn expression taint his lover's face Yamamoto leaned forward and brushed away some of the silver strands. Emerald eyes met his own, questioning.

"I'm sorry." He spoke, quickly retracting his hand. Gokudera watched him for a moment before speaking again.

"Your Italian is quite good compared to the others', who taught you?" he seemed genuinely curious, but to Yamamoto the question only made the painful truth even more obvious.

"You did." He responded, turning away to look down at the gardens once again.

"Oh." Gokudera let out a soft sigh. "I'm sorry…" Yamamoto heard the chair shift and soft fingers touched his own.

"It's okay." He said, even though it was not. "Don't worry about it." He turned his hand to gently squeeze those fingers and let a small smile trace his lips.

Yamamoto sat on a wooden bench under one of the weeping willows. It had begun to darken, but the sun would not set for another couple of hours. A warm breeze made the leaves above him rustle and he could hear the cooing of doves. For once he was not sure of what to do. What if Gokudera's memories never returned? Would he stay here by his side in Italy, abandoning the family? He was not even sure if the Italian could come to love him again. He took a deep breath and craned his head backwards, staring up at the swaying leaves. Light footsteps alerted him that someone was approaching and he shot straight up reflexively.

"There you are." The Italian's voice was mirthful, probably amused at his reaction. "Expecting ninjas or something?"

"Something like that." Yamamoto relaxed and let out a soft chuckle, sinking back down on the bench. Gokudera's lips curled upwards as he slid down next to him. For a moment neither one of them spoke, but Yamamoto could feel that the other man was just waiting for the opportunity to speak.

"Are you leaving?" the words came out so quiet that he was not sure if they had been said at all. He glanced sideways, but the Italian's head was bent forward, his silver hair hiding his face. He did not know what to answer him, but obviously his mouth did.

"No." Gokudera twirled around, watching him in astonishment.

"Really?" his voice was trembling slightly, as if he had been expecting the opposite. "You're not leaving like the others?" Yamamoto heard the unspoken "_leaving me alone_" and shook his head, knowing that he would not be able to leave even if he wanted to. Gokudera's face lit up. "Then I'll go inform Bianchi and the staff. You didn't bring any clothes, right? We could visit town and buy some for you tomorrow." He stood up and started walking away, but stopped and turned around. "And Takeshi?"

"Yeah?" he responded, thinking how beautiful he was as the dying sun basked him in a warm light, his eyes practically glowing.

"You should smile more."

**

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[AN]:

Hope you enjoyed =3 And Gokudera's not really OoC, it's just that he can't remember anything and doesn't know how to react to all these people who show up that he supposedly knows, but just leave again, which is why he's scared of Yamamoto leaving.

It will probably take longer for me to post the next chapter as I have upcoming exams, but as soon as they are over I'll try to write as much as possible

If you liked it please review =3


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: **My name is not Akira Amano, so no owning…

**Warning: **An 8059 fic, so if you don't like boyxboy you better not read it.

**Side note: **Anything that isn't in the flashbacks is spoken in Italian.

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Yamamoto awoke to the sound of chirping birds. Rolling out of bed he opened the French windows, closing his eyes as the morning sun caressed his face. He stepped out on the balcony, the light fabric of the curtains swaying behind him. No matter how many times he took it in, the sight before him was breathtaking. He watched as the sunrays traveled over the grounds, soaking the treetops in a warm pinkish glow before touching the lake, glittering as a couple of swans sprung into the air, and then the light spread across the grass, finally illuminating the rose gardens below. It was then he spotted the lone figure slowly wandering between the trees by the mansion, eyes closed. Yamamoto rested his cheek in one of his hands, leaning on the railing as he watched him. The young man had stopped by one of the trees, his hand resting on its trunk. Slowly the emerald orbs opened and a soft smile tugged at his lips. Witnessing this Yamamoto found himself smiling. Maybe it was wrong of him, but at that moment he found himself thinking that if it gave him such peace, then the memory loss might be worth it. He picked one of the flowers growing at the railing and let it fall. It floated through the air, landing on top of the silver hair. A hand shot up, bringing the flower to his face, gently cradling it. Eyes gazed upwards, searching, meeting his own. Once again he found the Italian studying him quietly. For how long they stood there, simply watching one another, Yamamoto could not tell.

"Good morning." He greeted, grinning widely. He must have looked silly, because Gokudera snickered before returning his smile.

"Slept well?" he looked slightly worried and Yamamoto quickly nodded, remembering their conversation the night before. "Well, that's good then. Care joining me for breakfast?" in response he flung himself over the railing, landing in front of the horrorstruck Italian with a low thud. "Are you okay?" despite hearing the panic in his voice Yamamoto started laughing, earning himself a punch at his shoulder. "Don't scare me like that you bastard!" he chuckled and touched the other man's shoulder with one hand, steering him towards the house.

"So… breakfast?"

"Hey! Don't ignore me!"

No matter how many times he had gone shopping with the Italian he could never get used to how the other man would drag him into one store, scan the racks quickly and then give a disapproving snort, only to head back out again, or to grin widely and push him towards the clothes. Today was no different, just that Gokudera seemed pleased at their first stop, something that usually could take around five stores.

"This is perfect." With that said he grabbed Yamamoto's arm and steered him towards the inner part of the shop. Eyes skimming over the towers of fabric in front of them, his lithe fingers quickly found a target and pulled it out, barely shifting the rest of the pile. Yamamoto glanced down at the piece of clothing that was held towards his chest, trying to ignore the proximity of his lover. It was a black shirt with rolled up sleeves and a faint skull pattern on the breast pocket. He chuckled only to receive an annoyed glare. "What?"

"That's more like something you'd wear." Gokudera gave him a disbelieving look. "Well, when you're not wearing suits that is." He recalled having a very nice picture of the man in clothes quite similar to the ones he was holding, but figured that he might have a heart attack if he showed it to him. "How about this then." He grabbed the shorter man and placed him in front of one of the mirrors. He leaned forward so that their reflections were in eyelevel. One hand caught some of the silver strands and tucked them behind the Italian's ear. "Did you notice these?" his finger brushed against the piercings and he felt the other man shiver.

"I figured Bianchi had done that to me." Gokudera's eyes moved sideways, breaking their eye contact.

"You did them yourself." While swearing quite profusely because of the pain, but he did not need to know that.

"Well…" the silver head studied himself for a moment. "I do look kind of good in them." Yamamoto felt himself smile as he shook his head.

"You didn't notice all the women glancing at you when we walked down the streets?" he laughed at the Italian's stunned expression. "You look rather hot even dressed like that." This time he could clearly see the blush painting the cheeks underneath the silver curtains.

"You don't look half bad yourself." He heard as the other man disappeared into the maze of attires.

Bianchi's eyebrows flew upwards as she peeked into one of the bags they had brought back home. For a moment she just stared at the clothes before turning to her brother.

"You bought this for Yamamoto?" she pulled out a pair of slimmed grey jeans with an attached chain.

"No." Gokudera grumbled and snatched them away from her. "They're mine." Grabbing the remaining bags he fled the room before she could give him a reply. Instead she gave Yamamoto a suspicious look.

"I didn't say anything." Bianchi smirked at him as if daring him to say it again. "Well, just that he would look good in them." and totally badass.

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**[AN]: **Well, for the shopping scene I hadn't really intended for Yamamoto to be flirting with Gokudera… as much xD he didn't seem to mind it though so ^^

Please review if you liked it =3


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: **I still don't own KHR D=

**Warning: **Some Gokudera language and it's an 8059 fic, so if you don't like boyxboy you better not read it.

**Side note: **Anything that isn't in the flashbacks or in _italics_ is spoken in Italian.

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Yamamoto looked up as a pair of pale hands made contact with the table he was sitting at, trying to refrain from staring too much at the man in front of him.

"I guess you were right." Gokudera was not looking at him as he spoke; instead his eyes were focused on one of the many rings that now decorated his fingers. "I found these in a box in my room." Yamamoto watched as he absentmindedly fingered on one of the rings, turning it from side to side. "Though…" one hand reached up and pulled out a chain from underneath his shirt, revealing another ring. "This one was too big." Yamamoto chuckled and moved forward, taking the ring in his hand, watching it for a moment before letting it fall back towards his lover's chest.

"That ring never fitted you." The Italian gave him a curious glance, catching the double meaning of his words.

"That's relieving." He smiled softly and touched it again. Then he grinned at Yamamoto. "Considering my length I would have been humongous for it to fit." At the thought of this they both burst out laughing, not caring as Bianchi passed, giving them a strange look.

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"_It's too big you baka." Gokudera glared at him, but his hand closed tightly around the ring. "Not everyone has as big hands as you do, you freaking giant." Yamamoto reached forward, pulling at the Italian's hand, bringing it palm to palm with his own. They both stood silent, watching the hands, then Yamamoto leaned forward, seeing how the other boy's eyes flickered to his face before their lips touched.__ For a brief moment he felt the softness of the other's lips before realizing the danger he had just put himself in and pulling back. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?" the silver head was raging, his hands clenching Yamamoto's shirt as he snarled at him. "Don't bloody kiss me if you're only going to give me such a measly kiss!" then it was Yamamoto being kissed, feeling the other one furiously pressing against him._

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He sat in an armchair inside the library, silently watching the Italian deeply immersed in a novel. Slender fingers moved up every now and then to push up the glasses that were threatening to fall off, other than that and the flipping of pages there was no movement. Yamamoto's eyes never left his lover's frame, knowing that he was too lost to notice. How many times had he spent the short fragments of time, squeezed in between missions, in their small room back in Japan doing the exact same thing? But it was different now. The openness that had come to Gokudera with his loss of memory was something that Yamamoto had struggled for him to show in the past, but now he felt that there was an invisible wall, much stronger than what had previously kept him from reaching out to the other man.

* * *

"For how long were you planning on staring at me?" Gokudera inquired, eyes still fixed on the book. Yamamoto's lips parted to answer him, but no words came. The other man sighed and closed the novel, turning his head to watch him. Standing up, the Italian waltzed over and peered down at him before speaking again. "If it's boring you, just say so and we could do something else."

"Watching you is never boring." He chuckled and pushed himself up from the chair, now towering over the smaller man.

"How could watching another person be so…" Gokudera's voice faded upon noticing their proximity. A faint blush spread across his face as he reached up to push back his glasses. "Well, that's…" he backed a few steps, but Yamamoto followed, not letting the distance widen.

"Hayato." His words were nothing more than a whisper, but the Italian's eyes instantly shifted to his face. Smiling softly he leaned forward.

"Yamamoto!" Bianchi's voice had them flying apart before she stuck her head into the library. She paused for a moment, letting her gaze travel between them. "Sawada is calling."

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"_Tsuna-san?_" Yamamoto pressed the phone that had been given to him by one of the maids to his ear.

"_How is he doing?_" his boss' voice was hopeful, but a sigh was heard when he did not answer. "_He didn't recognize you either?_" The words stung and for a moment he just wanted to hang up on his friend.

"_No._" Yamamoto's jaw clenched before he continued. "_Not at all._"

"_Oh._" There was a slight pause and he heard Tsuna talking to someone else. "_I'm sorry._"

"_Don't be. If it's anyone's fault it's-_"

"_Stop it Yamamoto-san._" The other man cut in. "_Right now I just need to know if you think his memories will return. I can't have two guardians missing._"

"_You mean..?_" the rest of the sentence got stuck in his throat.

"_I want you to come back to Japan._"

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**[AN]: **Sorry about this chapter being kind of late, but I've had a slight concussion and didn't feel like touching my computer D=

Hope the content made up for it though~ =3

I put in lines since ff doesn't seem to understand where I want to separate my paragraphs, if anyone knows how to do it in a better way, please tell me =)


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: **Do I need to keep doing this? I obviously don't own KHR…

**Warning: **Some Gokudera language and it's an 8059 fic, so if you don't like boyxboy you better not read it.

**Side note: **Anything that isn't in the flashbacks or in _italics_ is spoken in Italian.

* * *

"_No._" he would usually not go against his boss, but at this matter he would not let Tsuna decide. "_I'm staying with him._"

"_Yamamoto…_" he heard the other man take a deep breath. "_You do understand what grave consequences losing two guardians would have on the family, right?_"

"_I can't just leave him!_" he burst out, not caring that the maid who just walked by looked as if she got a heart attack.

"_Yamamoto-_"

"_I'm staying._" He was about to hang up, making his words final, when Tsuna spoke again.

"_You have to think about what's best for him and the family. Gokudera wouldn't have wanted the family to suffer because of him._"

"_What if it had been your wife?_" Yamamoto retorted, knowing very well that Tsuna's sympathy was not only one of his strengths, but also his greatest weakness. "_Would you just leave her, knowing that she was confused and lonely?_"

"_As long as she would be happy I wouldn't interfere and bring her back to the Mafia world._" Tsuna responded calmly. "_Even if she didn't remember me it would be better than her having to worry about us all._"

"_But he's not happy here! Can you imagine Hayato wandering around in a mansion without something to do? He can't stay here!_" He knew that the Italian would never be able to stay hidden away in the mansion. He was the one who would always become restless without having something to do to help their boss, even if it was just simple paperwork. He would literally set himself on fire if that was their boss' wish and there was no way that Tsuna was not aware of it. But now… Yamamoto could never leave him like that, not after seeing the desperation of those emerald eyes under the weeping willows.

"_If you won't come back yourself, I'm sending Hibari-san to fetch you._" Judging by his tone it was not an empty threat.

"_He would never agree to it._" Or at least, that was what Yamamoto hoped.

"_Yes he would, if I told him Nanimori's peace was depending on it. And I could probably bribe him with a match against myself and Reborn._" He was right; the cloud guardian would do almost anything if it ensured the safety of his precious town. And Hibari would definitely jump at the chance of fighting either Reborn or the Vongola tenth.

"_I'm staying._"

"_Then I'll tell Hibari to head for Italy._" There was a brief pause when Tsuna spoke to someone on his side. "_He'll be arriving tomorrow._"

* * *

The door slammed shut behind him. He slumped down on the bed before releasing an agitated growl and lying down on his back, glaring at the ceiling. Yamamoto knew that he was not acting as his usual self, but right now he just needed to vent all his built up frustration. He had not felt this way in a long time, not since that time. Years had passed since then, but his chest still tightened thinking about how Gokudera's stubbornness had almost gotten them both killed. His fingers dug into the fabric underneath him, clenching it.

* * *

There was a soft knock on the door, but Yamamoto could not bring himself to answer. Silence fell and he pondered whether the person had left. His head fell back against the mattress just as there was another knock, much louder this time. Whoever was outside had not given up. He heard a few curses when the third knock was also ignored. Realizing just who it was on the other side Yamamoto began to sit up, but froze midway as the door was flung open, revealing his lover. His brows were scrunched together, but his frown eased upon spotting him on the bed.

"At least answer when someone's knocking." He grumbled. With a few strides he was sitting next to Yamamoto, watching him cautiously. When there was no response his eyes shifted to the floor. "Who was it that called?" his words were barely audible at first, but then Gokudera straightened and met his eyes once again. Instead of the dejected face that Yamamoto had been expecting from the sound of his voice the Italian's expression was almost angry, his emerald orbs filled with determination. "You sounded upset."

"It was my boss." Now it was his turn to look away, all of a sudden frightened to see the other man's reaction. "He told me to return to Japan." He dared a glance at Gokudera and noticed the sadness that flashed across his features before the man regained his composure. "Don't worry." He mumbled, leaning closer. Gokudera turned his head with a glimmer of hope in his eyes. Yamamoto could feel the heat from the other's skin as he inched closer. Then he could no longer resist and his arms moved on their own, wrapping around the smaller man, pulling him against his chest. He felt the Italian tremble as Yamamoto's lips brushed against his ear. "I'm not leaving you."

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**[AN]:** Sorry for another late chapter, to be honest I realized that I hadn't finished a 8059 picture I started drawing a few weeks ago, so I was working on that xD I apologize for leaving you hanging.


	6. Chapter 6

**[AN]:** Gah! I'm so sorry about not updating . I forgot to tell you guys that I had an exams period and wasn't able to finish the chapter before that D=

Well, you guys should know the deal by now, so I'll just let you read the chapter~

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Silver strands tickled his nose as he breathed, eyes closed, taking in the familiar scent of his lover. A faint melody zippered in through the still open door, hovering around them. He felt Gokudera shift and found himself gazing straight into his eyes. The other man slowly closed his eyes, hiding away that precious green, and a soft smile adorned his features.

"Bianchi's playing." He murmured, drawing Yamamoto's attention back to the music. It was not a piece that he recognized, but as the trembling notes resonated through the room he could hear the grief coming from every key pushed down on the piano. As the last sorrowful tremor died out he turned towards the Italian. "I composed it right after coming here." His voice was filled with remorse. How much was the man hurting without showing it? Yamamoto's fingers brushed across his pale cheek, wanting nothing but to ease his pain, but Gokudera turned away. "I…" he glanced back at him and sighed. Then he rose and silently strode out through the door. Yamamoto stared at the empty doorway, hand still raised. A few seconds passed, then the other man's head popped into view. "Are you coming or are you just going to sit there like an idiot?"

* * *

The piano glistered in the sunlight that filtered through the thin curtains. Thin fingers danced across the surface as the Italian passed, opening the grand windows. He stood still for a moment, letting the wind caress his face before returning to the instrument. Sitting down he patted the empty space next to him on the stool, indicating Yamamoto to join him, and reached to open the lid covering the keys.

"So…" Gokudera's face split into a wide grin. "What shall I play?"

"There's one… I don't know what it's called…" he chuckled and scratched his cheek. "But I think it starts something like this..." watching the other man Yamamoto pushed down one key, then letting his focus shift to the instrument before him, he slowly played a soft tune. He saw Gokudera shift and then there was a pair of hands next to his own, moving swiftly beside him, not faltering for one second as the melody grew stronger. As he tried to copy the movements, however, the movement quickened and he could see a smirk adorning the silver head's face. Not willing to lose he tried to keep up, failing miserably. But his pathetic attempt was not futile, at least that was what he thought when a laugh escaped the other man's lips. Soon the joyous sound rang throughout the room and seeing his mirthful expression, Yamamoto could do nothing but to join him.

* * *

"That was fun."Gokudera snorted and glanced down at the abused instrument. "Though I wouldn't say it sounded especially beautiful."

"Does it matter?" Yamamoto asked, seeing the surprise in the other one's face as the Italian opened his mouth, lips moving wordlessly. The other man obviously wanted to disagree with him, but found that he was unable to do so.

"Fine. You win this time." He scoffed, but Yamamoto could see the slight curving of his mouth. "Well I-" his eyes darted to the open windows, widening slightly. Following his gaze Yamamoto saw something fuzzy sitting on the windowsill. Before he could determine what it was the small creature scurried across the floor, past them and into the hallway. Gokudera was already on his feet, chasing after it. In his hurry to follow Yamamoto's legs got tangled in the stool and he barely avoided planting his face on the floor. Once he made it to the hallway there was no trace of the other man.

* * *

After wandering around inside the mansion for quite some time without finding the Italian, though he did meet some bewildered maids that had seen him rush by, Yamamoto slumped against the wall, not sure if he was to continue his pursuit. After all, Gokudera was bound to return to his room sooner or later. Deducing this he decided that lingering around in the hallways were not going to make any difference and that he instead ought to head back to his room. Once he started walking there was the echo of running footsteps resounding through the corridor. Peering over his shoulder Yamamoto noticed that it was Bianchi, looking slightly flustered.

"There you are." She inhaled deeply before continuing. "Hayato is running around like crazy so I decided to find you instead." He chuckled at her words, knowing very well how his lover probably looked, having seen him chase after Uri on several occasions. Bianchi was also smiling, but her expression suddenly turned sullen. "Actually I wanted to know what Sawada said to you." Yamamoto quickly scanned the hallway, but even though there was no one there his words came out hushed.

"_Tsuna-san wanted me to return to Japan._" Jaws tightly pressed together he resumed walking, Bianchi not far behind. "_I said no of course, so Hibari-san is coming here tomorrow._"

"_Hibari_?" judging by her tone she was not pleased to hear it. "_Does Hayato know?_"

"_No._" he sighed, running his fingers through his hair. "_I didn't tell him._" Watching Bianchi intently he asked her the question that had been nagging him since he arrived. "_Did something happen between those two..? Hibari-san seemed weird and it's not like Hayato to refuse someone's help on a mission, despite his stubbornness._"

"_I don't know. All I know is that Hayato was supposedly furious when he stormed out from the Japanese HQ…_"

"_Well, I guess we'll see tomorrow._"

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**[AN]:** Once again, sorry for being late… hope you all had a nice Christmas (or if you celebrate something different or nothing at all)


	7. Chapter 7

**[AN]:** Happy new year everybody, hope you've had a great start =3 Beware of angsty chapter!

Remember: flashback = things are spoken in Japanese

* * *

_When Yamamoto came back from his mission and headed to the Vongola tenth's office at the Japanese HQ to report he was surprised to see the other guardians there. Why had they come back to Japan? The most urgent question had crossed his lips before he could stop it._

"_Where is Hayato?"the room turned deadly silent. Seeing the expressions of the others he felt his knees buckle underneath him. In a flash the sun guardian was by his side, holding his upright. "Where is he? Where's Hayato?"_

"_There is something you must know." The intenseness of Tsuna's eyes kept him from protesting as Ryohei steered him towards one of the couches, making him sit down. "Gokudera is no longer here." Without fully understanding what he was hearing Yamamoto watched as Tsuna's gaze faltered. "Your mission was taking so long and Gokudera… well, he got more and more irritable by the day, so he…" Tsuna fell silent, his face twisted in sorrow._

"_That herbivore left on a mission by himself." Hibari's stoic voice added when their boss remained silent._

"_Then, where is he?" Yamamoto asked, feeling as if his heart ceased to beat when he noticed how his fellow guardians all tried to mask their sorrow._

"_Why did you let him go alone?" realizing that he was screaming he closed his eyes and leaned back against the couch. He knew that the others were equally upset. After several deep breaths he continued, his voice barely audible. "Shouldn't someone have gone with him?" They were always sent out with at least one partner, Tsuna knew the dangers so why?_

"_He knocked me out and took off on his own." Yamamoto stared at him flabbergasted, his anger subsiding. Gokudera had knocked _Hibari_ unconscious? For that to happen he either would have had to gain superpowers, not that he doubted his lover's abilities, or Hibari would have had his guard extremely lowered. As if reading his thoughts Hibari glared at him, but then he averted his gaze. "I was careless."For a moment Yamamoto almost thought he had seen a flicker of sorrow in the other man's eyes._

* * *

"Hayato!" Yamamoto's hands stretched out in the darkness, desperately trying to catch what was not there. His eyes flickered back and forth in panic, trying to determine where he was. Suddenly remembering he sunk back against his pillow, trying to calm his erratic breathing. Gokudera was safe.

* * *

"_He's still alive. He's in Italy, with Bianchi…" Tsuna hesitated, his eyes fixed intensely at his guardian, but continued speaking. "The thing is… he doesn't remember… he doesn't remember _anything_."_ _As Yamamoto grasped just what those words meant the world blackened around him. It was as if someone had pulled a thin veil over him, blurring out the rest of the world. He could still hear Tsuna talking, see how his lips moved, his sad smile, but everything was like a haze, the only thing echoing through his mind were those words. "_He doesn't remember _anything."_

* * *

Safe… yes, without the traumatic memories of his childhood. Without a clue of the agonizing pain he had gone through. Without any idea of the constant danger he had faced.

* * *

"_Che… sometimes I just wish it could all go away." Yamamoto raised his head in surprise, trying to figure out what his lover meant. But Gokudera was not watching him; his eyes were focused on the clouds above._

"_What..?" he pushed himself up on one elbow, watching the Italian as he leaned back against the grass. Emerald eyes met his for a brief moment before closing._

"_It's just that…" Gokudera held up his arm, his loose shirt falling back to reveal a long scar. His thin fingers traced the white mark and Yamamoto could see them shaking. "It was so close…" when the other man did not continue he opened his mouth, but was quickly interrupted. "Don't say I'll just have to be more careful the next time! Can't you get it into your head that sooner or later there aren't going to be fucking next time!" his fingers dug deep into the cloth, teeth clenching. "We'll _die_ Takeshi. There's nothing we can do…" a sudden gust revealed the tears threatening to fall behind those silver strands. Instantly Yamamoto was by his side, cradling him in his arms. "I don't know what to do…"his hands reached up to Yamamoto's face, stroking his cheeks as the tears streamed from the green orbs. Gokudera's lips pressed against his own almost desperately, fingers burying in his hair, pulling him closer. "I don't want to lose you."_

* * *

Yamamoto covered his face with his hands, trying to shield himself from the truth. His lover might be _safe_, but what about himself? Could he live knowing that he might never return to him?

* * *

_Gokudera laid motionless on the narrow bed, his face ashen. Only the ragged breaths showed that he was still alive, still with him. Yamamoto's fingers trembled as they brushed against the bruised skin below the Italian's eye and he could taste his lover's precious blood as he leaned down, lips softly touching. He did not dare to think of what he would do if that barely moving line on the monitor flattened. His cries filled the room as he slumped against the bed._

* * *

The night seemed darker than ever before, threatening to engulf him as he tried to hold back the sobs. But out they came, strangled, forcing their way through his quivering lips. So there he laid, his body convulsing as the grief poured out, slowly letting himself get drenched in the shadows that lured in the night. _Tsuna's eyes watched him with grief. "I'm sorry Yamamoto."_

* * *

**[AN]:** Omg what did I do? T_T This part wasn't supposed to be so long, but then more and more popped up in my head and then it just happened D= I promise to make the next one cheerier


	8. Chapter 8

**[AN]:** Since it's Valentine's Day I felt that I needed to finish the chapter. My original intention was to upload a new chapter once a week, but that doesn't seem to be going too well xD (I've been buys with school and have also been doing some drawings for dA) I can't guarantee how frequent the chapters will be, but I'll try to update as often as possible.

* * *

A low groan escaped his lips as Yamamoto straightened his back, slowly stretching out from the fetus position he had curled into during the course of the night, a futile attempt to protect himself as he had pressed the pillow close to his chest, clinging onto it instead of the person who was no longer there. He felt the blood returning to his stiff fingers as he rubbed them against his eyelids, removing any trace of his pitiful weeping. Hesitantly opening his eyes he could still see them though, red crescents marring his palms, evidence of his suffering. His eyes traveled towards the windows, the faint light filtering through the curtains was dancing across the floor, telling him that it was already noon. Deciding that lingering in there would only intensify his pain, Yamamoto crawled out from underneath the covers, reaching for his clothes.

* * *

It was as if nature knew about him finally giving in to his anguish and was now determined to mock him. All the windows had been opened by the unsuspecting maids, the drapes swaying gently in the sunlight as a mild breeze, carrying hints of blossoming life, swept by. His footsteps were accompanied by the mirthful voices of the birds soaring through the air, playing hide and seek in the thick leafage. He swore even the padding of the maids' feet sounded livelier as they walked past him in the hallways and hurried up and down the stairs, arms filled with laundry, both clean and dirty, flowers in decorative vases to be placed in the numerous rooms, all of them smiling while doing so.

* * *

Even Gokudera seemed to be shining as he walked out to the patio, finding the Italian at one of the tables, a broad smile stretching across his features and his silver hair tied back in a messy knot. The other man did not seem to notice him at first, his eyes fixed on something tiny cradled in his hands that were resting on his lap. Curious to what could have drawn that endearing look onto his lover's features Yamamoto stepped closer, causing green eyes to flash up, connecting with his own. He froze for a moment, only now seeing the thin cuts across the pale cheeks. Opening his mouth to ask what had happened, Yamamoto noticed the mirth in those eyes and took a few strides forward, peering down at the source of this joy. He cannot help it; his lips practically curve upwards on their own accord when his gaze reaches the small furry creature. Not too surprised, he has seen Gokudera like this before after all, Yamamoto lets his finger brush against the soft fur, which feels like silk against his calloused skin, gently scratching the top of the kitten's head.

"I'm guessing this is our uninvited guest?" he arches a brow at the Italian, carefully lifting the small animal, despite its hissing and scratching.

"Yes." The other man watches him intently as he sits down on the edge of the table, petting the struggling feline. He does not miss the small frown as the kitten relaxes, nuzzling his hands. "How did-?" Gokudera's expression wavers between admiration and annoyance, before settling at disbelief. "It took me hours just to catch her!"

"I'm just good with animals." With that Yamamoto laughed at his baffled expression, handing back the kitten to him.

* * *

"So, did you decide on a name?" he sent a quick glance at the small cat that was now perched on Gokudera's shoulder, claws buried deep in his shirt in order to remain at her claimed spot as they strolled through the park. Most of his foul mood had dissipated, but there was still a lingering feeling of unease that intensified upon the reply given.

"I think Melon would be cu- err nice." The silver head smiled softly, stroking his fingers against the kitten's chin. Yamamoto was not sure what he had been expecting, but not this. Not again.

"No." the word was out before he could stop himself and the other man looked at him in surprise. Was this going to keep happening, his lover repeating past actions and comments, not knowing that they have already gone through it before, not noticing how much it hurt him? Yamamoto clutched the front of his shirt, shaking his head without returning the other's gaze. "No."

"I know it's silly for a cat, but what the fuck is wrong with it?" Gokudera growled, clearly thinking that he did not approve of his suggestion.

"It's not that." He sighed, rubbing the crease between his eyebrows, not sure what to tell him.

"Then what is it?" the Italian was not yelling at him yet, but he could hear by the wavering of his voice that he was not far from it.

"_Because you have Uri right there!_" Yamamoto pointed towards the belt that Gokudera had decided to wear that day, not realizing that he had switched language out of frustration. Then, without another word he marched back towards the mansion, not caring about the fact that the other male was not following.

* * *

He did not stop once, not even when he passed Bianchi, until he was back in his room, shutting out the light behind him. He must have tipped one of the chairs when slamming the door, because his foot was caught by something in the darkness and he stumbled forward, barely catching himself by gripping the bed frame. He let himself slide down, landing on the soft mattress, his foot pulsating with pain, but not aching quite as much as his heart.

* * *

**[AN]: **I'll try to have the next one up sooner.


	9. Chapter 9

**[AN]: **Once again, I'm really sorry about me not updating that often…

* * *

Maybe he was feeling a little guilty. Maybe he was regretting his outburst now that his lover's pained expression had registered fully. Why had he been unable to keep his mask of naïveté on and just laughed like he had so many times before? Before he had the time to wallow in more regret there was a sharp knock on the door. Yamamoto had barely had the time to turn around in bed when he heard the lock click and footsteps approach him. He looked up at the figure standing beside him, distinguishing Bianchi's features in the dark room.

"Hibari is here." As quickly as the words had been uttered she was out the door, leaving Yamamoto to process the information by himself. Moments later the door slammed shut behind him as he dashed down the hallway, still trying to button his pants.

* * *

They were on the patio, seated adjacent to each other by one of the small tables, Hibari smiling softly as he patted the small kitten. _Smiling_? Yamamoto did a retake, confirming that the countenance of the normally stoic man was indeed displaying something that looked suspiciously akin to joy. In fact he looked rather handsome if one took a closer look, though it was not like Yamamoto actually did. He was not that handsome really, at least not compared to the Italian next to him. What did that silky black hair and eyes like steel have against ethereal silver strands and glimmering emeralds? But studying them he noted that they actually complemented each other really well. If it had not been for the suspicious glint in Gokudera's eyes the picture painted out before him would have been perfect. Since when did the two of them look so good together? Almost as if they had heard his thoughts a pair of grey eyes met his and the slight curving of those lips suddenly looked taunting. Yamamoto had never before been so scared of Hibari.

* * *

He was a coward. Yamamoto knew it, but he could not move from the spot. Neither did any words leave his lips as he stood there in the shadows by one of the pillars, watching. Gokudera's previously stiff posture had gradually eased and it looked as if he actually was having a normal conversation with Hibari. He was not close enough to hear their words, but the trace of a smile on his lover's face made him wish he did. Had Bianchi not told him that her brother had seemed frightened by the cloud guardian? What was different this time? He had never seen them get along so well ever before, Gokudera had always complained about the other man not being dedicated to the familiga and had shown a clear dislike that Yamamoto had thought to be reciprocated. Had he misread them all this time?

* * *

"_That bastard." Gokudera slammed his bag onto the table, cursing as he started throwing his clothes at Yamamoto, clearly expecting him to put them in the drawers. He placed them on top of it instead, knowing that his lover would scold him later for sorting them wrongly if he attempted to put them away. "Why does he always..?" the bag creaked miserably as it met the wall, falling to the floor in two pieces as Yamamoto rushed forward to calm the raging Italian. "If it wasn't for Yuudaime insisting I would never go on another mission with that conceit 'I do things my way so don't interfere' __bastardo! __Maledizione__a lui__!" Gokudera's voice faltered as Yamamoto's fingers touched the back of his neck, turning into a soft groan as they gently started massaging the tense muscles. "I wasn't done insulting him you idiot." His eyes closed and his head fell back to rest on the taller man's shoulder._

"_You should try getting along better with him." He placed a kiss to the Vongola right-hand man's temple, the silver tresses tickling his nose as he did so. "You shouldn't hate him."_

"_I don't." Gokudera sighed loudly. "He just irritates me. Just like you do."_

* * *

What if Gokudera had meant something with those words, even if he had not realized it back then? He was probably just letting his imagination run ahead of him right now, but Yamamoto could not shake the uneasiness that Hibari's arrival had given him. The scraping sound of a chair being pushed back brought his thoughts back to the pair at the table. He took a step back as Hibari, with Hibird perched on his shoulder, passed him without even glancing in his direction. Instead of revealing himself Yamamoto remained behind the pillar, now completely hidden from Gokudera's view. Was he spying on his lover? Maybe. Anyone who saw him was bound to think so anyway as he crouched and crept closer to a huge flowerpot situated closer to the table. The other man was too preoccupied playing with the kitten to notice him. He pushed back some of the flowers, peering between them, feeling more nervous now than he would on a mission. Even though he was beginning to feel rather stupid and paranoid, Yamamoto remained, not sure what reaction he would get if he suddenly popped out of his hiding. Anyone would be angry if spied on.

"I'm stupid for feeling this way, am I not?" the Italian pursed his lips, looking dissatisfied. The small creature did not reply, instead it jumped down from the table and disappeared into some bushes. "Maybe Bianchi would know…" Gokudera stood up, heading back inside. Yamamoto contemplated for a second before following. Since he was already stalking him, why not continue and see what happened?

* * *

The task was harder than expected as there were few places to hide in the corridors, meaning that he had to wait until the Italian had turned around the corners before he could hurry after him. He could not run either as the sound would definitely alert the mafioso that there was someone on his trail. The maids who stopped to ask if he needed something were not helping either. Then he almost walked straight into Gokudera, barely stopping by the corner as the silver haired man knocked on the door to the room that presumably belonged to Bianchi. The door swung open and Gokudera stepped inside. The moment it closed Yamamoto was standing by it, pressing his ear to the thick wood. At first he could only distinguish their voices and then words like _Japan_, _Takeshi_ and _Hibari_. With a quick glance around he bent forward, listening by the keyhole instead, this time hearing both of them clearly.

"What about him?" Bianchi's voice was reluctant, as if she had already anticipated his reply.

"I feel so strange when I'm around him, like there's something I should remember." Gokudera hesitated for a moment before speaking again. "Like he's very important to me…" he heard a gasp as if the dots had finally connected in the Italian's mind and Yamamoto was pretty sure his heart stopped at his next words. "I love him, don't I?"

* * *

**[AN]:** I'm not going to make a promise about the next chapter coming sooner, but know that I'm trying to write when I have time between my homework.  
Sorry if the chapter seems rushed or something, but I want to actually finish the story so =P


	10. Chapter 10

**[AN]:** **IMPORTANT!**

I wish I could tell you that I'm going to start posting more regularly, but I have exams and then I'm going to Japan for 7 weeks (not bringing my computer!) I'm so sorry T_T I'll try to post several chapters the week after the exams/before going away.

I can't guarantee this however, since I'm not very inspired to write this story right now. I want to, but every time I sit down to do it, nothing comes out… I might be posting some oneshots just to get my writing back on track =\ To be honest I'm probably going to stick to oneshots for a while after I finish this story since I'm feeling bad about leaving the story hanging.

**Warning: **Same as before, BL, Gokudera's foul mouth and OoCness.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned KHR then this story wouldn't be on _fan_fiction (Do I actually have to do this?)

* * *

Silence seeped out of the room like a thick fog and the rain guardian could no longer hear his frantic heartbeat, despite feeling its hastening pace, nor the sound of his breath as it caught in his throat, struggling in vain to escape the lips that were now parted in shock. Ignoring his body's pleas for him to breathe Yamamoto leaned towards the door again, anxiously waiting for Bianchi to answer. No words came. Why was she not answering? Not once had he seen Bianchi as someone who would struggle with words, so why did the room on the other side of the door remain quiet? No longer being able to pretend that he did not need oxygen to keep standing the Japanese man inhaled sharply, regretting it the next second as sound returned to the world. He had missed it. Any trace of Bianchi's reply had already vanished from the air when he realized that she had spoken. He did not have to wonder for long what her words had been as Gokudera's next question could probably be heard from the other side of the hallway.

"Why the hell didn't you tell me?" Even with a door separating them Yamamoto knew exactly what kind of expression his lover was making. By now the delicate brows would have turned sharply downwards and not only would the skin between them be scrunched together, but also that of the brink of his nose as it, together with his upper lip pulled up, revealing gritted teeth. A slight tint of red should have draped itself over his pale cheeks and those green orbs of his glistering like gems, sharp and deadly, but the same mesmerizing. How many times had he not been the receiving part of the fuming Italian's wrath? "If you knew, then why… why aren't you trying to stop me from falling for him again?" Angry huffs came from the young man as he seemingly tried to calm himself enough to actually listen to what his sister would say.

"Is it really that easy Hayato?" Bianchi's voice turned dangerously low and resulted in a spluttering silver head as he furiously tried to defend himself. A sigh came before she spoke again. "I know you wouldn't be stopped anyway."

"But he's a man! It means I'm fucking gay! Why aren't you minding?" to this Bianchi actually started laughing, which only seemed to make her brother more agitated. "S-shut up! This is serious!"

"I found _that_ out years ago, so why fuss about it now?" Yamamoto held back a chuckle; her finding out about their relationship had not quite gone as planned.

* * *

_He was not sure of how exactly they had gotten there, his mind solely focusing on Gokudera's heated lips against his neck. Yamamoto let out a breathy moan, head falling backwards against the wall, his fingers burying themselves deep in silver locks as he felt soft hands sliding against his stomach, pulling his shirt up in the process. Quickly ridding himself of the piece of clothing he grabbed the smaller teen's head, lips latching themselves to that deliciously soft mouth. He felt the storm guardian shudder in pleasure under his hands as they discarded his shirt as well and Yamamoto pressed himself against the smaller form, trapping him against the opposite wall. Skin rubbed against skin as their breathing became more ragged, both desperately craving the other's touch. Suddenly everything was blinding white, causing both of them to groan loudly before it dawned upon them that someone was standing in the hallway, watching them. As their eyes adjusted to the light it was revealed that it was Bianchi who had wrenched open the door to the small closet in which they had so cleverly decided to let their hormones take over. She had not looked even remotely surprised at the sight of her little brother, who was missing a few articles of clothing too much to be seen in a public area, tangled in a questionable position with another male in a confined space, saying something along the lines of '__At least it's you' before closing the door again. _

"_That went good right?"Yamamoto let out a nervous laugh as her footsteps died out, not quite daring to look at his boyfriend. As Gokudera remained silent he turned towards him, seeing the horror written across his features as the Italian continued to stare at the closed door, eyes wide and his mouth gaping as if his soul had left him._

* * *

The siblings had both gone quiet and Yamamoto realized that maybe it would not be that good if he was still standing right outside the door, looking like he had been listening in on them, when they decided to come out. He had been too preoccupied by the conversation to pay any notice to his surroundings, so when he backed away from the door Yamamoto was surprised, to say the least, to see Hibari standing not far from him. The older man gave him a disapproving look, certainly not impressed by his extremely gracious leap backwards, that did not almost have him presenting the floor with his behind.

"If I had been an enemy you would be dead, Yamamoto Takeshi." Hibari strode past him, stopping in front of the door, turning his head to spare him a cold glance. "Every predator knows that you should always be watchful. If not, what would happen if to leave your prey alone?" His fist slowly rose as if to knock on the door. "Who knows, it could get damaged or maybe even stolen by another." Hibari was clearly threatening him, there was no doubt about that, but why would he go out of his way to actually say it? Yamamoto knew from experience that his fellow guardian was not a man of many words. Was this perhaps his way of telling him that he wanted a fair fight? Was the older guardian giving him a chance to claim what was his before he himself would do so? Yamamoto opened his mouth to speak, but hurriedly closed it again. It would be of no use to question the man. Hibari's fist connected with the wood and they heard shuffling inside before the door opened. Gokudera blinked upon seeing both of them standing there.

"Can I help you?"

"May I have a word with you?" Bianchi nodded in confirmation as Hibari moved forward, stepping into the room. Yamamoto did not miss the slight flickering of his eyes as he passed Gokudera, or the glance that the silver haired man gave him in return. He did not like the display of emotion that he could see in those eyes he held so dear. The Italian joined him in the hallway, his expression silently asking him what he was doing there.

"I was just passing by." He assured, a wide smile instantly covering the previous emotion he displayed. Yamamoto was not even sure what exactly his face had shown, but he saw the questions building up in the emerald pools before they darted to the side. As he started walking the Japanese man followed him, sensing that he wanted to talk. Turning the corner his intuition proved to be right as the other male's hand wrapped against his upper arm.

"Why did you come here?" Gokudera stared at him intently before realizing that he had to be more precise. "Why did you come to Italy?"

"I…" He stopped. What was he supposed to say? That he was worried about his lover? That he hoped that he could somehow bring back Gokudera's memories? That would only mean that he would need to explain what exactly their relationship had been. Yamamoto was not sure just how the other man would react to something like that. He settled for part of the truth. "Is it not alright to worry about someone you care for?" the Italian nodded before releasing his arm, briskly walking past him towards his quarters.

* * *

Fingers swiftly pressed the buttons, dialing a number he knew by heart. Not even two signals passed before a '_yes?_' came from the other end.

"_It's me._"

"_Oh._" The other voice sounded mildly surprised. "_I thought it would be Hibari-san reporting._" Yamamoto ignored his boss' comment and asked the question that had been nagging him.

"_Did something happen between Hayato and Hibari?_" A heavy sigh came from Tsuna's end of the line.

"_Did Hibari-san start a fight?_" The Vongola boss sounded tired and Yamamoto heard him mumble under his breath: "_I knew there had to be a reason as to why he agreed to go before I had to start bribing him._"

"_Ah, no. I meant before Hayato lost his memory, when I was away on that mission._" Tsuna was quiet for quite some time, probably trying to recall any odd occurrence. As he seemed to be unable to do so Yamamoto tried a different approach. "_Then, was Hayato acting weird in some way?_" Even if he did not remember anything involving the two guardians, Tsuna might have noticed if something was strange with the Italian, seeing how devoted the man was to their superior.

"_Well, now that you mention it, there was something Gokudera came to me about._" He paused as if wondering how to word it. "_Gokudera asked me if one could love two people at the same time._"

* * *

**[AN]: **Wow, that turned out longer than expected xD I'm trying to get things moving since I don't want this story to drag on forever. I know it can't be fun waiting for a story that is never updated.

I guess you've noticed by now that I like the 1859 couple as well as 8059 **and I wonder if you guys would mind if the story might turn towards that couple instead**.


	11. Chapter 11

**[AN]: **If you didn't read the last author's note I just want to inform you that I will be leaving for Japan tomorrow, meaning that I will not be able to update for the next 7 weeks unless I manage to get enough time to go to an internet café and write there. I will bring my note books where I keep my stories so I'll hopefully write a couple of new chapters so that I can update as soon as I get home.

* * *

Once again Yamamoto found himself under the weeping willows. This time, however, he felt even more dejected than the last. What was becoming of him? He had taken out his frustration on the person he cared about more than anything, then resorted to the cowardly act of stalking him and listening in on a private conversation and now, on top of that, he had found out that his lover may be harboring feelings for _Hibari_ of all people. A weary sigh escaped his lips as he slumped against the bench, his head falling back against the backrest. Even if he had been Gokudera's lover before his memory loss, Yamamoto was unsure whether he could stand a chance against Hibari if the normally stoic man had actually become enamored with the Italian. Dark clouds, carrying with them the promise of rain, moved slowly over the sky's vast canvas that spread out before his eyes, but Yamamoto could not see them. He was already lost in the forest of his mind with memories, so precious, yet fragile and easily forgotten, flickering in and out of his vision. It hurt knowing that he was the only one who still had them. He was slowly brought back to the present by the cool drops connecting with his skin, sliding down his cheeks as his they were tears. The sky had darkened and a flash of light, followed by a low crackle foretold the thunderstorm that was sure to come. As he made his way back to the mansion, shoes threatening to slide out of control against the slippery grass, the soft drizzle morphed into a massive downpour, water now cascading down on his poorly clad form.

* * *

The door was still open when he came back, inviting him into the warmth. Standing right in the opening was Gokudera, wrapped up in a thick blanket, another one slung over his arm and two steaming cups in his hands. He had obviously been expecting Yamamoto to come rushing and that thought made the Japanese's heart do a flip out of joy. Despite this, his previous thoughts did not vanish; instead the considerate action filled him with guilt. One hand reached out to touch the smaller man's cheek, fingers dripping from the rain gently caressing the skin that felt blazing under his touch.

"You're freezing!" Gokudera's eyes widened in shock and he hurriedly stepped back to let Yamamoto inside.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?" the Italian looked at him, a mix of worry and surprise written across his features.

"You know, for yelling at yo-" the whole apology never left his lips as Gokudera cut him off.

"Just forget it." A warm mug was pressed into his hands and the material felt like it was burning through his palms. Peering down into it in curiosity Yamamoto noted that it was hot chocolate. When he made no attempt to drink the heavenly liquid or get inside Gokudera's tone turned annoyed. "Are you coming inside or are you going to wait till you're sick?" he then swirled around, telling the maid standing by the door to bring a towel and a dry set of clothes. Since he was now shaking with cold Yamamoto did not hesitate to step inside, lifting the tempting drink to his lips, letting it pour down his throat with big gulps and spread its warmth through his system.

* * *

Once he had been properly dried off and changed clothes, upon which the other male had blushed and turned his back to him, Yamamoto draped the blanket around him and walked over to one of the windows where Gokudera was seated on the floor. Noticing him the silver haired man shifted closer to the glass and Yamamoto took his seat across from him, feeling Gokudera's toes brush against the side of his hip as their knees bumped against each other, his own feet resting beside the silver haired beauty's hip. He did not dare to move them closer, despite desperately wanting to do so as he felt the heat from the slim leg pressed against his own seep through the fabric of his pants. Curled up next to him like that, hair slightly ruffled by the blanket and cheeks glowing with a slight pink from the heated drink, the other man looked so beautiful it took all his power not to lean over and press a kiss to those lips. To distract himself he playfully yanked on Gokudera's blanket with his toes, earning him a chuckle before the Italian tried to hide his amusement by bringing the cup to his mouth, his eyebrows angling inwards, but his eyes shining with mirth. Yamamoto concluded, while the rain still fell down as if it was trying to drench the land and the sudden bursts of light danced across the sky, that he had not felt so at ease in months.

* * *

Unfortunately the feeling did not last for long as Hibari stepped into the room, book in hand and Hibird nestled in his dark locks, sitting down in one of the armchairs on the other side of the spacious area. Yamamoto knew that he had come to watch them, his eyes silently sweeping over their forms before turning to his novel. Letting his gaze fall back to the Italian Yamamoto noted that he too was studying the older male, but Gokudera's expression was nothing like his own, instead of annoyance and the slightly hostile look he knew was written across his features, the storm guardian looked almost serene, as if he had been calmed by the other's presence. His irritation transformed into a smile the moment Gokudera's attention returned to him and Yamamoto felt the pounding of his heart pick up its pace as his lover gave him a soft smile of his own, a faint hue of scarlet spreading across his cheeks. Deciding to ignore Hibari since the man was obviously not going to leave any time soon, Yamamoto carefully let his fingers brush against Gokudera's ankle, waiting for him to protest. Instead he was rewarded by a deepening of the blush as the silver haired male quickly decided to look out through the window. A smirk touched his lips as he let his hand slide further up the calf, his thumb moving in gentle circles. The hatred oozing from the other side of the room made the joy he felt glazed with something akin to victory, even though he knew that things were far from over.

* * *

Gokudera had fallen asleep and was leaning against the window, his cheek lifted up slightly as it pressed against the cold glass that was painted white with each breath, and with one of his arms loosely curled around the lower part of Yamamoto's leg. The sound of pages flipping was still present and as he too leaned against the thin barrier separating them from the harsh weather the rain guardian could feel his own consciousness slowly drifting away. He was not sure how long he had been out when a firm hand shook him awake. Groaning and blinking as he tried to get his focus on the person who had so rudely woken him Yamamoto noticed that it was Bianchi. A glance to the side informed him that Gokudera was still deep in dreamland and judging by the fact that Bianchi had now moved over to where Hibari was seated she probably wanted to speak with them alone. Therefore he pushed himself off the floor, careful not to wake the other man and walked over to the others. Sitting down on the armrest of one of the armchairs the Italian woman began to speak.

"_I called Sawada to inform him that Hibari will be staying._" Dread filled Yamamoto, even though he had already suspected that it was going to happen. "_He complained that we keep calling him in the middle of the night._" Bianchi seemed somewhat amused, almost as if she was contemplating on calling once again to see his reaction. "_He wanted the two of you to know that since he is currently missing three guardians he has summoned some of the Varia members and that you will be responsible for some missions here in Italy._" Hibari nodded in confirmation before closing his book and standing up, exiting the room. Bianchi soon followed, leaving Yamamoto alone with the sleeping Gokudera. Kneeling beside him he scooped up the Italian in his arms, holding him securely against his chest as he made his way to the other male's quarters.

* * *

When he placed Gokudera onto his bed he stirred slightly, clutching Yamamoto's shirt. Awfully tempted to use it as an excuse to slip into the bed as well he stood there, half bent over the man he loved with one arm still resting underneath his shoulders and the other resting against the mattress next to his head. He leaned closer, lips hovering just above Gokudera's, so close he could feel the heat without actually touching. How he longed to give that kiss, but not like this. Uncoiling the fingers that had latched to his shirt he straightened, tucking the covers around Italian before backing away and heading towards his own room.

* * *

**[AN]:** I hope you liked this =D I really wanted to get it up before I leave so that you wouldn't have to wait as long. I'm somewhat torn between wanting to finish the story and making it into a really long one since it might be rushed otherwise. It's up to you guys to decide, if you're patient with my really slow updating I'll probably make it last longer '^^


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